


Pony, Prank, or Snorkack?

by Catstaff



Category: Harry Potter - Fandom, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-07
Updated: 2019-11-07
Packaged: 2021-01-25 01:47:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21348250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Catstaff/pseuds/Catstaff
Summary: While taking a walk, Draco Malfoy meets something that annoys him even more than Harry Potter.This started out as a writing exercise, a conversation between two randomly drawn pop culture characters. I died laughing at my pair, and decided to flesh it out into a fun little one-shot.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20





	Pony, Prank, or Snorkack?

Draco Malfoy was not happy. Nothing had gone right this year. He was still sure Potter had cheated his way into the Tri-Wizard Tournament despite all the Gryffindor’s protests to the contrary, and he’d been looking forward to seeing his rival getting what was coming to him during the course of the tasks. But Potter had the unmitigated gall to not just survive, but actually win the Tournament! He wasn’t even charged with murdering Diggory, thanks to Madam Bones questioning him under veritaserum.

Exams, but for OWLs and NEWTs being over, Draco decided to go for a stroll by the lake, close to where the Forbidden Forest approached the shore. Anything to get away from Pansy and her clinginess. Why she was so convinced they would eventually marry was beyond him. She was all right to look at, he supposed, but nearly as thick as Crabbe and Goyle. No, his parents had made it clear that he needed to pick a witch with a modicum of intelligence. Too much, and she might not want to properly keep her place as the next Lady Malfoy, but too little and she’d be too likely to commit a social faux pas that could ruin the family – not to mention the risk of her children being below average in mental acuity. Tracey Davis might be a possibility, for all she was a halfblood; at least she was a Slytherin and knew how to behave. Daphne Greengrass was out, as she was her father’s heiress and therefore would be looking for a younger son who would accept the Greengrass name instead of keeping his own. Her little sister Astoria was a good possibility, though – pretty, younger than him, pureblood, and reasonably intelligent without being overly ambitious. He’d ask his father to investigate the chances of a contract there once he got home for the summer.

He was so intent on his thoughts that he started at a voice suddenly speaking to him from the direction of the trees.

“Hi! I’m Twilight Sparkle, who are you?”

Draco stared. The voice appeared to be coming from a purple… something… that had just emerged from the forest. Vaguely unicorn-shaped, including a horn, it had huge eyes, pink streaks in its darker purple mane and tail, extremely small wings, and a sparkly star-shaped mark on its hip. “I’m Malfoy, Draco Malfoy. What in Merlin’s name are you, and why are you talking to me? Is this some sort of a prank? My father will hear about this!”

The creature – Twilight Sparkle? – gave the impression of a shrug. “I’m supposed to get better at making friends, and I saw you and I thought your hair was pretty.”

“Malfoys are not pretty. We’re handsome and elegant. Anyway, who charmed you to talk? That great oaf Hagrid couldn’t have done it,” Draco said.

“I’ve always talked, we all can. Who is Hagrid?” asked Twilight Sparkle.

Draco sniffed. “He’s a disgusting halfbreed who can’t even do magic properly. But senile old Dumbledore made him the Care of Magical Creatures professor anyway. That stupid oaf of a half-giant brought a hippogriff to class last year and it nearly killed me.”

Twilight Sparkle nodded. “I’m sorry to hear that. Did the hippogriff ever say it was sorry for hurting you? That is what you do when you hurt someone, right?”

“Oh, don’t be stupid,” Draco snapped. “Creatures can’t talk, only people can.”

“But I’m talking,” Twilight Sparkle pointed out.

“And I don’t believe you are,” Draco retorted. “I believe you’re just some prank of the Weasel twins. You’re just some goat or sheep under a glamour and a ventriloquism spell. I ought to get Professor Snape to track down the magical signatures on you, so that he can take points away from Gryffindor!” He headed for the castle at a rapid pace, the thought of Gryffindor losing more points immediately improving his mood.

Twilight Sparkle easily matched his pace. “I know I’m magical, but I don’t think there are any Weasel twin signatures on me. Who is Gryffindor and why would this Professor Snape take points away from him?”

“I’m not talking to you anymore,” Draco stated. “You’re not real and I’m not wasting my time.” 

Just as the unlikely pair approached the main entrance of the castle, the doors opened and a dreamy-looking blond girl in Ravenclaw robes drifted out. Her expression changed almost instantly when she saw Draco’s companion, lighting up in utter rapture.

“Malfoy!” the girl squealed. “You found a Crumple-Horned Snorkack! This is amazing! Daddy will be so pleased!” She shot down the stairs and wrapped her arms around the dumbfounded boy, kissing his cheek before releasing him to study the creature next to him. “Although I always thought Crumple-Horned Snorkacks couldn’t fly. I guess I was wrong, wasn’t I?”

“It’s not a Crumple-Horned Snorkack, Looney, you’re daft,” Draco sneered in disgust. “It’s just some prank done by the Weasel twins, I’m sure.”

“I’m not a prank,” Twilight Sparkle asserted. “I’m Twilight Sparkle. I came here to try to make friends, but I don’t think Draco wants to be my friend. What about you?”

“I’m Luna Lovegood, and I would be quite pleased to be your friend,” Luna said. “Will you tell me about yourself?” She draped a friendly arm over Twilight Sparkle’s shoulder and started to head for the quidditch pitch.

Draco watched the crazy Ravenclaw and the bizarre purple thing move off. “I give up,” he huffed, stalking off in the direction of the dungeons.


End file.
